Wedding Planning, Styling & Design: Finalising Your Wedding Guest List

Finalising Your Guest List


Q & A’s for Your Client When Finalising their Guest List…


Q. Who will be paying for the wedding?

          A. My parents will be paying [THE BRIDE]

Q. Do your parents have any expectations about who they would like to invite to your wedding?

          A. They would like to invite some of their oldest friends, as well as all of our extended family (i.e. great aunts and uncles, cousins etc.) and [the Groom’s] family would also like to invite some of their family friends and extended family.

Q. Is there any way both of your parents would be willing to negotiate and shorten the list of guests that they would like to invite?

          A. They definitely want all of our family there, but maybe we can negotiate a few less of their friends.

Q. Do you see all of your extended family often, and do you know them well? Maybe you could shorten the list by deciding on which family members you are close to and who you [the couple] definitely want to have with you on your day. Extended family that you have never seen, or don’t see often may not expect an invitation and you could always hold a smaller family event to celebrate your marriage afterwards?

A. We really only want our closest family and friends there, for an intimate gathering that feels personal and reflects us, with people that we know well. We will try to negotiate the list down to only our immediate close family, and then have our parents’ friends there too. I’m sure our families’ would be happy to have another gathering at a later time with our extended family if they feel that we should.

Q. Who MUST be invited?

A. We really must invite our immediate family (i.e. siblings and their families and children, grandparents, cousins that we are close to and their families), our godparents, our close college and childhood friends, and business colleagues and associates of [the Groom].

Q. Do you feel like you really must invite all of [the groom’s] colleagues, or could you reduce it to those who really do expect a courtesy invite and those who you are closer to?

          A.      I think we will be able to bring the list down to a few of [the groom’s] colleagues who will really expect an invite, and only the ones who work with him in his immediate vicinity.

Q. Have you invited any ex-boyfriends or girlfriends?

A. Yes, we have invited a few, however we are both quite close to [Bride’s ex-boyfriend] and his new wife so we would really like to invite them.

Q. Would you be able to cut down your list by not inviting any of the other ex-girlfriends/boyfriends?

A. Yes, I think we probably don’t need to invite them, as they probably won’t expect an invite – it is really just a courtesy invitation.

Q. Are you inviting ‘plus ones’ for any of your single guests?

A. Yes, we would like to include a plus one on each of our single guests’ invitations.

Q. Do you think you would be able to remove some of the ‘plus one’ invitations, or all of them, and discuss the inviting of an additional guest in person with selected guests who would like to have a plus one?

A. We really feel that it is only polite and courteous to add a plus one onto the invitations of single guests.

Q. Would you be able to negotiate by adding plus one invites onto the invitations of the single guests that you KNOW already have a partner or someone they would plan on bringing?

A. Yes, I think that would be fair to cut down the list a bit by only adding the plus ones onto the guests who we know will want to bring a plus one, and if anyone else wants to they are welcome to ask us and we can then consider it.

Q. Do you want to have children at your wedding?

A. Some of our friends have small children but we don’t really want to have children at the wedding, and don’t have plans to offer children entertainment

Q. Would you be happy for us to write the invitation wording differently, suggesting an ‘adult reception’, so that guests with children can arrange babysitters at home and not bring their children along?

A. Yes, I think that sounds like a polite way of notifying guests that they should not bring their children.


Wedding Stationery Proposal for Your Client


Wedding Stationery Timeline

Remember: The earlier, the better when ordering and sending out invitations

  • 8 Months Before Wedding Date: Order Proof for Save the Date cards and approve design
  • 7 Months Before Wedding Date: Order Finalised Save the Date cards (28 business working days required for delivery)
  • 6 Months Before Wedding Date: Send out Save the Date Cards
  • 5 Months Before Wedding Date: Order Proof for invitations, envelopes and acceptance cards and approve design
  • 4 Months Before Wedding Date: Order Finalised Invitations (including envelopes and acceptance cards) and Place Cards (28 business working days required for delivery)
  • 3 Months Before Wedding Date: Send out invitations
  • 2 Months Before Wedding Date: RSVP Date for Guests (Expect to receive your pre-stamped acceptance cards)
  • 1 Month Before: Order Menu cards and the Order of Service
  • 1 Week After Wedding: Order personalised photograph Thank You Cards
  • 2 Weeks After Wedding: Send out Thank You cards with a personal message


Wedding Stationery Proposal

o   Traditional Invitations with the traditional invitation wording, as hosted by the Brides’ parents.


Mr & Mrs [Bride’s Surname]

Request the pleasure of the company of

[Mr. & Mrs GUEST NAME]

At the marriage of their daughter

[Bride’s First Name, and Middle Name]


[Mr. Groom’s First, Middle and Surname]

At [The Church or Ceremony Venue Name]

On [Day, Date, Month of Wedding]

At [Time o’clock]

And afterwards at

[The Reception Venue Name]




o   A polite mention of an ‘adult reception’ to discourage guests from bringing their children.


o   Linen Finish Invitations with personalised Blind Embossing, and an embossed envelope and acceptance card


o   Embossed Place Cards using the same Linen finish paper, and an additional ‘novelty’ place setting that is more personal and reflects the style and personality of the couple (i.e. a miniature candy bucket, mini alcohol bottle and shot glass, cupcake in a jar, Mr & Mrs rock candy in a personalised glass jar, Bride & Groom wedding cookies etc.)


o   Menu Cards and Order of Service cards will be finalised with the chefs and minister one month before the Wedding Date and ordered in time for the Wedding.


[ All Images are from Pinterest]



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